This was written 7/22/16. I will post this later when I am free to do so.
We know what we know from the bank statements. I requested 2 years back, so I could see Mom's spending habits prior to sister in law (SIL) taking over Mom's care. What I saw was crazy spending under SIL's care for things obviously not for Mom. There is so much I could write about on that but this is about the lies.
Last night I decided to grab DH's phone to look at the text messages between him and his sister. He had to resort to text messages because her phone calls to him had devolved into one sided diatribes about how the world was against her. He could never get a word in, so he texted. The texts are a lot of her texting one message after another of the same crap about how the world was against her and how he was an awful person. I did a "dramatic" reading of the texts, with occasional commentary, on where the texts clashed with reality, or we talked about what we now know to be lies.
She lied about the $10,000. In her texts she said she had no clue what that $10,000 withdrawal was about. The statements show that the money was taken out of one account in April when DH was just getting the lawyer. It was transferred to another account that had Mom's name on it and from that account Child Support Collections took the money in May. In her texts she plays dumb. SIL wrote that she had no clue why the money was taken out.
That $10K will probably be the straw that will convince DH to file some sort of charges against SIL, maybe. He keeps changing his mind, but reminding him of it gets him steamed.
I should mention all of this year, Mom was not living in the same house as SIL, but Mom's money was paying for SIL's housing as well as her own, totaling over $6000 a month just for rent. Someone else was taking care of the day to day needs of Mom so beyond paying her rent there was no legit reason for SIL spending Mom's money.
There were the texts when SIL was asking DH for money, well 1/2 his paycheck. Looking at the bank statements and her texts, we are so glad we did not give her one red cent. That's when we all were going by Adult Protective Service's lie that the accounts were frozen. But that's for another post.
During my reading of the texts I reminded DH that he did not know then what he knows now. Reading the past few months back to him made him realize his sister played him like a fiddle with the guilt trips based on lies. She could because she apparently knows her brother, who is a pushover. He felt guilty for judging her in the past and wanted to make up for it by giving her the benefit of the doubt and defending her against Adult Protective Services. He's still torn. He loves his sister, but he is hurt by her betrayal and boldface lies to him and Mom.
From January to June SIL managed to spend down over $60,000 of Mom's money, leaving her with barely enough to cover her care. She covered it up with lies. Lies, lies, lies.